A Coaching Power Tool By Daniel Dilger, Coaching for Emerging Leaders Coach, GERMANY
The Concept “Circle of Control vs. Out of Control”
The “Circle of Control vs. Out of Control” power tool is based on the cognitive behavioral principle that our emotional well-being is largely dependent on focusing on aspects of life that we can influence, rather than those we cannot. The tool encourages rational analysis and detachment from external, uncontrollable factors and helps clients develop a practical understanding of these philosophies by applying them in day-to-day life. Applying the tool in a coaching environment shall provide the client the opportunity to shift their attention from things they cannot control to things they can control. It gives the clients a feeling of being in charge and being able to navigate through challenges in situations where there was no way out foreseeable before.
Expanded Concept Details “Circle of Control vs. Out of Control”
Understanding the Circles:
Circle of Control: This includes actions you can take, decisions you can make, and attitudes you can adopt. For example, choosing to learn a new skill, adjusting your daily routine, or adopting a more optimistic viewpoint.
Out of Control: This encompasses external events, other people’s actions, large-scale economic or environmental factors, and past events. Recognizing these helps clients release unnecessary stress related to trying to change what they cannot influence.
Self-Awareness Development:
The tool fosters deep self-awareness as clients learn to continuously observe and assess their reactions to different situations. They learn to ask, “Is this within my control?” This question becomes a fundamental checkpoint before reacting emotionally or taking action.
Methodologies
Cognitive Restructuring:
Coaches can guide clients through cognitive restructuring exercises to challenge and change the pervasive thoughts that lead to stress about uncontrollable aspects. This could involve reframing thoughts or challenging catastrophic thinking patterns.
Behavioral Experiments:
Clients can engage in behavioral experiments where they focus on controlling their response in a situation they previously perceived as out of their control, observing the outcomes, and adjusting their perception and behavior accordingly.