As coaches, we are responsible for raising client’s level of self awareness, supporting the client to focus on the positive, leverage on his learning and strengths to make balanced decisions and mindful action that help him move forward and live a more fulfilling live. (See below sections; “Questions For Reflections and “Self Help”).
Questions for Reflection
Goal:
- What’s important to you at the moment?
- Is that a need or a want?
- What must you accomplish in the next 12 months?
- What are you working on at the moment?
- What challenges are you struggling with at the moment?
Reality (Current) :
- What is the current situation?
- How do you feel ? What makes you feel the way you are feeling ?
- Where are you sabotaging yourself? How is your current mental and physical state serving you towards your goal(s) ?
- How are your feelings affecting you and your family members ?
- What are the things that you have that you are grateful of ?
- What would it look like if you choose to take charge of your situations?
- What’s working well for you at the moment?
- What isn’t working well at the moment?
- What have you done so far to improve things?
- What are you willing to endure to see your goal become a reality?
- What have you lost and what have you gained in your last employment ?
- What profit can you make from the learning at your last employment ?
Options:
- Going forward, what do you think you should do first?
- If you could only take the one option that you believe would add most value, what would it be? What would be the most helpful thing that you could do now?
- What’s the best use of your time at the moment?
- If you could only do one thing this week, what would it be?
- If you saw someone else in your situation, what would you suggest they do?
- What would help you to eliminate the negative distractions to your present state ?
Way Forward:
- What are you going to do in the next 24 hours?
- What is your activity plan for next few weeks towards your goal ?
- How motivated and committed are you in reaching this goal? Rate on a scale of 1 to 10. What will it take to turn that 5 or 6 into a 8 or 9?
- Who do you need to speak to about this goal?
- How are you going to celebrate reaching your goal?
- Whatever your first step is, can you think of anything that might stop you from doing it?
- Is there anything else that you need to consider before starting?
Self Help To Rise Above Circumstance?
i) Visual Aid
To serve as a constant reminder on the blessings one has.
ii) Visualize
Picture oneself succeeding in becoming what you aim to be, to build confidence and self-assurance. Not only is visualization effective, it also has a calming effect:
iii) Focus on what’s going well
Make a game to find something positive in every day. However, for everything going badly, there are probably dozens of things going well. Make list, and post it where it’s visible.
iv) Profit from the past and unpleasant experiences
Find and reflect on the good “what can I learn” from every unpleasant experience.
v) Symbolic band
Wear a wrist band and call it whatever that stimulate positive thinking and wear it as a reminder of what and who you’re becoming.
vi) Self acceptance and self love, improve body chemistry to better embrace calm
Accept yourself for who you are. Keep a good relation with yourself and love yourself. Make conscious effort to take deep breath, engage in healthy activities; take a walk or eat something healthy to elevate mood and alleviate stress, anxiety to react appropriately in those moments. Self-acceptance is the first step towards self-confidence. True happiness comes from within. As soon as you realize you can be happy whatever the circumstances you are free.
vii) Build self-esteem- replace negative thoughts with positive ones.
Identify those limiting or (self) sabotaging thoughts you can replace them with better, more positive, ones.
References
Robin S. Sharma, 2006, The Greatness Guide, Harper Element
http://dictionary.reference.com
http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifehack/how-to-control-the-way-you-react-part-one.html
http://www.inc.com/jeff-haden/how-to-be-graceful-under-pressure.html?nav=pop
http://www.inc.com/geoffrey-james/positive-thinking-7-easy-ways-to-improve-a-bad-day.html
http://patrickschriel.com/2010/06/07/how-to-build-self-esteem-and-love-yourself/