A Coaching Power Tool created by Allison Sharpe
(Life and Relationship Coaching,UNITED STATES OF AMERICA)
Coaching is partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their personal and professional potential
(International Coach Federation, 2013).
Professional life coaches are trained to help clients first gain clarity, then guide them through actions that propel them forward to specific goals or outcomes. Coaching focuses on uncovering limiting beliefs and supports clients in creating new beliefs in a more aware state. Sessions generally last for twelve weeks but can be shorter or longer depending on the client and his or her goals.
A life coach may focus on one niche such as health/wellness, grief, parenting, or corporate coaching. If a coach doesn’t designate one particular area, they are considered a general life coach and help in all areas of life. The most common life coaching areas are spirituality, finances, work, relationships, personal growth and health. Even when a coach specializes in one particular area it is common for the client to explore other areas with their coach as they dig deeper into their initial area of concern. For example a client may seek a health coach to help them lose weight. During the course of coaching the client may discover that some of their weight gain has come from stress at work and thus may want to work through finding and managing those stress points. A professional coach can navigate all areas even if they specialize in one area.
A relationship coach is a coach who specializes in helping their clients achieve deeper more fulfilling connections with the people in their lives. In simple terms relationship coaching is about human relationships and how to make them better. A relationship coach will generally help a client sort through all life issues but pay special attention to issues surrounding other people. A relationship coach can help a client simplify what is important in each relationship. As the client gains clarity about what they want to achieve the relationship coach can provide support the client needs to build desired relationships.
Relationships
Unless you live on a deserted island and your best friend is a volleyball named Wilson, you have relationships – some of which may be draining. You may try and try to communicate but sometimes dealing with a particular person seems like an impossible feat. Even in the best of times certain relationships may feel scary because you fear losing that relationship. Every relationship has it’s ups and downs and a relationship coach is there to walk with you through the good and bad. Below are the various types of relationships, issues within those relationship areas and how you may use a relationship coach to grow, nourish or save those relationships.
Self
The most important relationship a human has is the relationship with self. You may argue that self comes after a relationship with God, and this is a good point, but if you really think about it this is a fine line. Before you can choose God you have to understand who you are, your beliefs and how it relates to God. If you choose to follow God, at that time He becomes number one on the list and takes a commanding role in your life.
Finding peace within yourself may be the most difficult goal to reach. This is because you and I have stuff. Stuff is everything in our lives that we have (physical), feel (emotional), think about (mental) or love (spiritual.) And oh how we love our stuff. Sometimes we even love our bad stuff because even though it’s painful, it’s comfortable. To get to a centered place within ourselves we need to sort our stuff, simplify it, then love what we have (not obsess about what we don’t have.) A professional life coach can take you through a series of exercises to help determine where you are in each area and where you want to be. From there your coach will partner with you to get to the desired level in each area of life. Getting to a place of love and understanding for yourself is imperative before you can attain what you want from other relationships.
Spiritual/God
Although spirit is not a human relationship, it’s still a relationship that you may want to improve. All relationship coaches may not feel comfortable with this topic as this isn’t traditional relationship coaching as it applies to dating, marriage and the like. Within the deeper sense of the word relationship I find it important to offer this area of coaching to my clients because relationship with God and the values that come with it can influence many decisions and choices in your life.
Dating
When teenagers start dating in high school, there is no handbook or manual on how to treat each other. As teenagers grow into adults they base their dating behavior on several factors such as their parent’s relationship, friend’s relationships, scenarios he or she has heard in the music they listen to, and couples he or she has seen on television. Most relationships in our younger years are based on physical attraction and not much thought is put into who we are choosing to date. Over time we want to settle down but since we haven’t had much practice in the art of getting to know someone we end up going out with the wrong people.
Further, if we’ve had a few break-ups along the way or a divorce, re-entry into the dating arena can be intimidating. A good relationship coach can help you define specifically what you want in a date. Getting to the root of why you want someone in your life and how to make it happen is all within reach with the help of a coach. For those actively dating a relationship coach can evaluate some of your dates and create an awareness around what was good and what will bring you better results on future dates.
Committed / Exclusive / Engaged
Many people do not know how to communicate, compromise, handles stress, or work through issues with their partner. This leads to frustration that can turn into sadness, anger, and even violence. Many people also have never been taught to honor commitment. When one or both people in a relationship are not committed, infidelity is more likely to occur.