In summary, many self- limiting beliefs were imposed on children at a very early age from parents, grandparents and or peers. The media, churches, neighborhoods and other environmental factors have spread their web of influence. Even personal experiences and interpretations about life events impact a person’s belief system. Basically, the thoughts and feelings a person has regarding the certainty of something ultimately becomes their reality about that thing. It must be said here that there is a question as to whether limiting beliefs have redeeming value. Obviously there are those beliefs that keep people safe. For instance, if one believes that they can fly and acts upon that belief the consequences could be deadly. There is a reality though that must be recognized. Then there are perceived realities and real certainties. The wisdom is to know the difference. In practice what frightens us, limits us.
Overcoming Limiting Beliefs
Enough has been written in this article about self-limiting beliefs. More importantly, however, the question to be faced is how can one-limit beliefs that have caused faulty logic, excuses, and fear? These beliefs must be eliminated or at least lessened by parents or grandparents or schools or other social agencies. The first step in moving from limiting to empowering beliefs is to identify the limiting belief. As one becomes aware of a limiting belief they can reframe that belief into something positive. That takes lots of practice. As one begins to identify these beliefs it becomes easier to do so.
Parents and other family caregivers who spend so much time with children don’t only touch the lives of children for the present but their influence and power are far reaching, affecting children far into the future. To change the belief system of children or better yet to avoid them forming an abundance of self limiting beliefs, parents and other family caregivers must be educated and informed about the powerful effects of negative and disempowering actions toward children.
For children to be confident, open-minded, risk takers and trusting, parents should develop for their children a network of support through critical life messages that are given in varied ways every day. The following are but a few. Positive messages include:
- I believe in you
- I trust you
- I know you can handle life situations
- You are listened to
- You are cared for
- You are very important to me
Such messages can guide children to develop enabling beliefs that consequently lead to growth, success, and a potential
Schools in particular must address how educators will tackle non-cognitive and even social skills. The educational community must shift its perspectives to design learning communities that promote the traits that are essential for students to develop positivity. Children are then empowered to grow up and honor the potential of the human spirit within them. Their future decisions will be impacted by the beliefs that they operate under.
Through love and acceptance and encouragement children’s sense of self is developed, valued and esteemed.
Life coaches can become an integral part of the change from limiting beliefs to enabling ones. As coaching becomes more prevalent and coaches interact and form coaching relationships with those who interact profoundly with children we must as Gandhi posits,
Be the change we want to see.
We must challenge our own limiting beliefs, get rid of those beliefs that are like brakes on our progress. Be confident that we as coaches can consciously and continually believe the best about our selves.