4. Routines, Structures & Resources:
With such powerful and tremendous knowledge and insights, we can create Routines, Supporting Structures and Resources in our daily life. They serve as reminders – they strengthen certain thought pattern, habit or skills – they cheer us up – motivate us when chips are down and spirits are grey. This is the domain, which most of the corporate training rushes into. With an in depth understanding of the Self Awareness, Engagement and Meaningfulness, we can bring Routines, Structures and Resources in a much more conscious and empowering way.
Some of the known and powerful tools are:
- Time Management
- Daily ‘to-do’ list: Dramatically improves one’s productivity
- e-Mails management: Modern day boon and bane - potentially biggest source of distraction and timewaster - learning how to tame it
- Goal Setting
- Engaging a coach
- Enlisting support team of friends & relatives
The list can go on and on. Idea is to create maximum opportunities for Engagement, Legacy Creation and living in accordance with your highest truth. It is not a destination- but every day journey.
Optimum Life Experience System can be done in a Group Coaching format. A 3-Day residential retreat is the most desirable format to facilitate coaching journey.
In one-on-one coaching, Optimum Life Experience principles work at the transformational level.
I am presenting two real life coaching situations to highlight some of the principles of Optimum Life Experience. Client’s name* is changed to protect the identity and honor confidentiality ethic.
Coaching Situation #1:
Carol* wanted to discuss her problem with Time Management. She complained about being overworked for most part of her professional life, working for more than twelve hours a day and getting exhausted. She wondered how
others get so much time to work, socialize, attend seminars/training programs, attend fitness regime…whereas despite a breakneck schedule, she reaches nowhere.
The coaching conversation that followed, I’d say is fairly representative of many individuals who have similar problems. Through coaching conversation, Carol realized that she was missing something very fundamental.
Here are the excerpts:
Carol: I am so tired and exhausted, I have no energy even to catch a peaceful sleep. I have lost balance of my life for many, many years.
Coach: You are obviously exhausted and also sound frustrated. What is it all about?
Carol: Howsoever hard I work; I do not get enough time to take care of my simple needs. It makes me feel sick. I wonder how others manage to get time to do all things!
Coach: Well, do you know such people?
Carol: Yes, there are many. For instance, my boss has all the time to attend his gym, socialize, take his family out on vacation and respond to all the mails and queries that we have. I think I am lousy at Time Management!
Coach: And what does that make you feel like?
Carol: I feel stupid, I cannot imagine me giving time to things that I like. Time is always so short. I think I’d like to discuss better time management and prioritization.
Coach: Sure! Let’s deal with prioritization. What happens when you do things that you like?
Carol: Well, I feel excited, I feel alive, I feel motivated, I feel energized.
Coach: Are you saying that you get energy from doing things that you love?
Carol: Yes, that’s what I said
Coach: So, Carol, if you take stock of last couple of days or whoever time horizon that you choose and list how many things you did that gives you energy.
Carol: Hmmm…hardly, rather – none whatsoever, I think.
Coach: You have been expending and exhausting your energy. What is your model of replenishing it?
Carol: I got it! My issue is not time management but how I overall engage with my life and things that are important to me!
At this moment, Carol could clearly see that her issue is not time management. She could see herself not honoring her own needs to engage in activities which matter her the most. Having understood the real issue, Carol went about re-constructing her daily routine. She could identify five hours in a day which she can effectively utilize in her physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual well-being.
Coaching Situation #2:
I present following coaching conversation with Brandon*. Brandon is a dynamic, successful entrepreneur who is committed towards success of his clients and learning something new each year to raise his bar.
The said conversation was part of three coaching sessions wherein Brandon was exploring Coaching Service as a new offering to his clients in the new financial year. While he was comfortable in terms of talking to his clients, mostly CEOs and entrepreneurs and present coaching services for middle and junior level managers, he was not sure of offering coaching services for them. He wanted to explore his thoughts on the same and get ideas on how he can make a successful presentation to his clients. In the previous session, Brandon had worked on a creative metaphor to hold client’s attention. We took from there and built on the continuity of the topic.
Coach: Brandon, I invite you to visualize your clients sitting in front of you in the same auditorium and reply the moment when you just finished your pitch on coaching using your creative metaphor
Brandon: Yes, it is very much alive in my mind. I can see and feel the excitement building up.
Coach: Brandon, now the situation is, for some reason, you cannot offer coaching for middle and junior managers. You have only one coaching offering and that is for CEOs/entrepreneurs only.
Brandon: OK…but I am nervous about this situation. I think that they might feel that I am burdening them too much.
Coach: And what would you burden them with?
Brandon: (after a long pause) I do not know!
Coach: What do you know about your relationship with them?
Brandon: I know that they trust me; I know that they find me as committed service provider. Ok…if I share my personal experience as Coach, they may believe that coaching is good for them
Coach: What else, besides personal experience?
Brandon: They are CEOs; they would need to see some research data….may be, I will do some research and present research data on how many CEOs use coaching services for them.
Coach: Or may be, you won’t?!
Brandon: No, I will present for sure. But I will use this only as reference. I want to use my personal trust and rapport with them.
Coach: Brandon, I’d invite you to hold the image of you addressing your clients. Please take deep breathes, settle down and just be aware of that image in front of your mental eye.
Brandon: (after a long pause) Yes, I can see very clearly the entire image
Coach: Brandon, without uttering a word, if you have to communicate the most essential message on your coaching offering, in form of energy transmission, what would that be?
Brandon: My energy is reaching them. It tells them that I am committed to your success. I have found something new and I am ready to share it with you. Through coaching, you will be more successful.
Coach: I invite you to hold this communication in the belly around your naval center. That is the seat of emotional energy.
What is the message that you get?
Brandon: I hear myself saying that we want to be successful; we have our challenges, but with each other’s help, we can succeed. And I have something that will be of great help to you.
Coach: What else?
Brandon: I feel confidence. And I want to share my confidence with them.
Coach: (after a brief pause) Brandon, it you are ready, I invite you to take the same communication to your Brain or Thought intelligence and hold it there.
Brandon: I feel trust. I can show them data and my experience as proof. I tell them, that there could be resistance in your mind; but we can try it out. I can offer them some free or discounted sessions. But I feel Trust here.
Coach: Brandon, one you are ready, I invite you to take the same communication to your Heart center, seat of Integration and larger knowing.
Brandon: (after a long silence) I find different energy here. I am calm and at the same time I am energetic. I am telling my clients, let us do it. I am telling them that a lot is demanded from you as CEOs; and you are also human beings, you need partnership, someone to express your ideas, emotions, check your decisions etc. I find myself connecting with them on human terms.
I want to stretch my arms sideways. (Eyelids still closed; Brandon stretched his arms and stays in that posture for a few moments).
Now I think I am ready. Thank you coach!
We ended the session. Brandon later informed me that he started working on different forms of communications (email, broacher, one-on-one meetings etc. and requested for an off line/non-coaching discussion to get my views on it.
Human Beings have vast and multiple dimensions of existence and intelligence.
More we explore, more we bring them into the light of awareness, more enriching is the life experience. Above two coaching experiences is a small demonstration of this perspective.
Personally, creating this article was an experience of Flow and Legacy Creation for me. I’d be extremely happy if you find some of these ideas useful to create an Optimum Life @ Every day!
Rajesh Vaidya [Dt. 15-January-14]