A Coaching Power Tool Created by Susie Tomenchok
(Business Coaching, UNITED STATES)
What does it mean to be stuck?
Caught or held in a position so that you cannot move.
What does it mean to paralyze?
Completely unable to operate normally or effectively.
Everyday each one of us gets caught in a situation where we might be stuck for a moment or longer but we overcome and continue on. Sometimes these moments take on a longer timeframe due to the situation or circumstances. These situations can be very powerful as we can choose to continue to be stuck or move beyond to allow ourselves to carry on. These moments can become routine for some and serve as a place of comfort because it can mean we remain in a place where the conditions are static and don’t challenge ourselves. These are choices that we make in our everyday lives and equate to the reality of our existence.
The question is, how often do you get stuck?
- Do you make choices in your day-to-day without extensive analysis?
- Do you consult another person to make simple decisions?
- Do you find the same “to-dos” on your list from one day to the next?
It is so easy to get stuck if we allow the areas of our life that tend to be “noise” become what we pay most attention. What should we do when we get stuck and how do we recognize that we are stuck? This is a great question to ask ourselves every day to see where we are not making progress or where we are spending too much time putting our focus and causing the important aspects of our lives to be ignored.
It is when we realize and adjust we see:
- There IS enough time to work on the important elements of life
- You feel empowered to explore new angles
- You DO have the control to move beyond being stuck
When you can recognize you are stuck, you can find what works to move you beyond.
Being More Than Stuck – Paralyzed
Sometimes being stuck can lead to becoming paralyzed. Sometimes if there are too many things at once that are drawing our attention away from where it really needs to be, we can go beyond being stuck. This application of paralyzed is the least impactful because if we can clear some of these items, or as life goes just wait until our focus shifts, we can move beyond being paralyzed.
As with getting stuck, this can show up very different for each individual. For some it is something they simply move beyond once they identify but others it stops them in anti-productivity and needs to learn to move beyond. Becoming paralyzed can be much more difficult to maneuver around. This is because being paralyzed is more than items getting in the way. It involves the reaction to these things or the element of emotions playing a role in the process. A person, a situation, a comment or just the way our bodies react in sync with everything which is weighing on us in our day-to-day can evoke these emotions. We need to be aware of this so that we can maneuver beyond becoming paralyzed or getting beyond.
Gaining Momentum – Unsticking
The first thing to consider is making yourself conscious of when you are stuck. When you recognize getting stuck you can begin to chart out why and when it occurs.
What does it look like when you are stuck?
- Are you putting off important tasks by doing things that aren’t necessary or urgent?
- Do you find yourself stuck in an emotion around getting through an event or activity?
- Are you thinking more about the circumstances around the situation instead of the details how to move through the situation?
It is challenging to objectively evaluate when you are in a place where you are stuck or if you are not moving at a pace that is appropriate for the circumstance. Working with a coach can help you see when you are stuck or how you can become paralyzed.
Coaching Application
Awareness
As a coach, we need to bring awareness to our clients in understanding then they get stuck or paralyzed. We can help the immediate shift and develop tools for our client to identify and move beyond the rut on their own. As coaches, we need to help our clients to identify and find mechanisms to help them continue on the path of development and enlightenment. This comes through understanding their triggers and allowing our clients to see for themselves, themselves.
Getting stuck is normal but everyone has a unique path and needs to know how to walk down and get through. Sometimes this can only happen with an outside objective perspective.
Approach
We can help bring the approach for our client by talking about time-frame, logistics of their situation (current and future), obstacles they may encounter and steps to move forward. This analysis of the structure allows the client to see how, where and the mechanism to get beyond being stuck.
As we know about being trained coach, we need to put this structure in place by allowing our client to see the steps on their own as we guide them through a process in exploring and expanding their awareness.