A Coaching Power Tool created by Irene Azoulay
(Cross Cultural Coach, FRANCE)
Whoever knows he is deep, strives for clarity; whoever would like to appear deep to the crowd, strives for obscurity. For the crowd considers anything deep if only it cannot see to the bottom: the crowd is so timid and afraid of going into the water.
Living a life of clarity means to truly understand yourself and to understand what your purpose is in life. It’s taking the time to take a step back, and be able to see the trees from the wood. It involves gaining self-awareness, getting clear on who you are, and getting clear on your goals. Obscurity is the opposite of this. Living a life of obscurity means you’re drifting without a destination. You’re living with your head in the sand. You’re not seeing what’s really going on. Once you get that clarity into your life, you move away from having a cloudy view of your life, to seeing it with 20/10 vision.
Living a life of obscurity can sometimes be the easy option in the short-term. You’re stuck in the comfort of the past, and it appears to be the easy option to continue doing more of the same. This can bring you short term gratification, but what happens in the long term? You go around fooling yourself into believing that the decisions you are making are the right ones. After some time however, you will find that you have robbed yourself of your energy. The past uninformed decisions you have made will catch up with you, and you will find yourself living a life which is not aligned with your values, and your true purpose in life. You will believe that you are a victim of circumstances, and perhaps even blaming others, but the outcome will be one where you are feeling unhappy and unfulfilled.
Living a life of clarity on the other hand involves getting in touch with your inner self. It involves getting clarity around your life purpose. By understanding your life purpose, you can make decisions which are in alignment with it. By better understanding who you really are, what your values are, what your strengths are, and taking the time to acknowledge your achievements, you will lead a more harmonious life. Your goals will be clear and your self-awareness heightened. You will find that you are adding to your life force, and as a result you feel excited, motivated, energized, empowered and have high self-esteem. There is long term fulfillment.
Imagine the following situation:
Jane has a very successful business which she created herself. She had spent many years investing all her time and energy building it up. She loves her
business.
Jane has just had a son, and now Jane is miserable as she cannot see how she can continue with her successful business, without damaging the relationship she has with her son. She cannot see how the business could continue to strive if she wasn’t as committed, in which case she would have to spend less time with her son. For Jane it was an either/or choice, and she wasn’t making any progress with her decision.
When Jane took a step back and explored her thoughts and feelings in more depth, she realized that by letting go of some of the responsibilities she had at work, and delegating to others, that she would be able to free up some more time. She recognized that the business could still be a success without her having to spend the hours she had devoted to it before the birth of her son. The growth of the business would just slow down somewhat, and she would have to learn to delegate more. She also saw this as an opportunity for her to help develop some of her employees, and to give them an opportunity to grow.
Jane realized that some of her concerns were based on feelings of guilt for not being more present for her son. She got clarity around that fact that to be the best mother she could be, she needed to be in the best place of giving. Jane recognized that to give up the business completely was not an option as it contributed to her happiness, and that her happiness was vital to her son.
Jane’s story is not uncommon. She found herself in a situation where she only saw two solutions, continue to work very hard, and feel guilty about not spending time with her
