Reflection on the “going” aspect of this power tool brought going on a trip to mind. In this context the trip needs to be a one way trip as returning to your previous place is not in your best interest. After you have made the decision to take a trip there will be some other considerations.
- Choose where and when you want to go
- What will it cost you?
- Who do you need to inform that you are leaving?
In travel there are delays- a delay can cause you to miss a connecting flight. By staying where you are, what opportunities are you missing out on that may take a long time to come around again?
Get a picture
Just as you would surf the Internet and check through magazines to see what to expect on your trip, get a picture (visualization) of what your new destination (new life) will look like.
When you are travelling by plane turbulence can be expected. Just as you would pay attention to the “fasten your seatbelt sign” or the message from the pilot look out for signs of problems and be strategically prepared for the challenges that are going to come along the way. Remember the turbulence will pass.
Security check points
Checking all along the way to see that all is in order and you are not taking anything that is not allowed with you, will help to make the journey smoother.
Anything to declare
As you get closer to your destination there may be a few things that you need to confirm are suitable for where you are going.
Like going on holiday there are some adjustments that you must make. For a holiday there is a new culture, different clothes, change in weather just to name a few. In your life, there may be new friends, a new approach and better opportunities. what preparations do you need to make for the next place?
As you make the move, having someone to be accountable to and to support you on your journey would be worth it. Seeking the services of a coach could prove beneficial.
Take action now do not wait until tomorrow. Procrastination is not a good companion-Jack Canfield
Along with the previous definition, in this context staying specifically refers to remaining in a place, situation or relationship that is no longer serving you.
While it may seem alright to stay, it is not enough to accept and live in the comfort of present situations that no longer serve you, it is better to pursue goals that will make a better future. Getting a clear vision of where you want to go and what you are going to do when you get there gives you the motivation to keep going.
The lack of vision and motivation causes you to stay. When you become stagnant your emotions can get in the way. What must be remembered is that, although emotions are short term they can be quite crippling. To this end you need to get beyond the negative emotions or it is possible to keep going around in circles and make no progress. In the meantime time is slipping away. When we stay, it is possible to miss your “season”. “There’s an opportune time to do things, a right time for everything on the earth” Ecclesiastes 3:1. As this verse says timing is important, in some cases there are opportunities that you miss that may not surface again. There are others that may come again but it may take a while before it happens.
Is the expiry date staring you in the face but yet you continue to use the product. You use it with caution because you are not sure whether it is safe to use it. What is its value? Have you over stayed your welcome? Are you just going through the motions? In the meantime what is happening to your self-worth?
Your career and relationships are two areas that the decision to stay or go will arise at some time. In the area of a career it is easy for this to become the norm. As you go through the motions week in and week out, eventually it can result in work becoming about paying the bills. As time passes this impacts on the passion you have for the things that you love and desire to pursue. When you don’t take action to move forward these things begin to die.
Staying in jobs or relationships, which no longer serve you, can weigh heavy on your self-worth and can even cause you to question your values. When you stay in a situation that is not working for you, you are settling for less than what you really want.
When something is not working for your benefit over time, it can cause, discomfort. This discomfort can cause you to be out of balance not only in the difficult situation that you face, but in other areas of your life.
A coach should be aware that this power tool may come up during the coaching relationship. With little or no explanation a client may decide that the coaching relationship is no longer working for them. A coach should therefore remember that the coaching process is not about him/her, it is about the client so if the client chooses to end the relationship they’re allowed to. This may have some contractual issues which will need to be worked out between the coach and client. A coach’s responsibility is to ensure that he/she has honored his/her part of the contract and has acted within the ICF competencies.
On the other hand a coach should be capable of showing their client that it possible to move beyond their fears, limiting beliefs, judgments or underlying beliefs and move on to a career that is more productive and relationships that are fulfilling.
- Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step. Martin Luther King Jr.
- Simply start, then keep taking what feel like logical next steps, and the journey will ultimately take you where you want to go- or even someplace better. Jack Canfield (The Success Principles)
- Sometimes it will be like driving through the fog, where you can only see the road 10 yards ahead of you. But if you keep moving forward, more of the road will be revealed, and eventually, you will arrive at your goal”. Jack Canfield (The Success Principles)
While staying can drain your energy going takes effort. As you go through day to day activities ask yourself how what you are doing contributes to the changes that you want to see in your life.
In order for us to move beyond situations that are no longer serving us we need to make a committed decision to let go or leave.
- Does staying support your values? Does it validate you?
- When you leave where are you going to?
- What are your fears?
- If you are fearful what are you fearful of?
- What do you need to leave behind?
- Why are you staying?
- What will propel you to leave?
The Success Principles (How to get from where you are to where you want to be) Jack Canfield
Take the step the bridge will be there Grace Cirocco
Six seconds website- Joshua Freedman
ICA (Coaching Development/Power tools) Action versus Delay
ICA (Coaching Development/Power tools) Commitment versus trying