A Coaching Power Tool created by Charles Kinglsey
(Transformational Coach, UNITED KINGDOM)
Working with clients provides the coach the opportunity to help the client to transform the sense of themselves as stuck in conflicts between their goals and their doubts to a mosaic of inner relatedness that allows greater sense of Self confidence.
Many of us struggle with our deep desires, hopes and dreams that feel thwarted by doubts, worries, judgments and inertia. My experience with clients suggests that we can support clients to enrich their lives by helping them learn to appreciate all the different inner characters and voices. That these are all necessary facets of who we are and make up the beautiful and unique mosaic of ourselves. We can help clients move from an inner polarity where a critical voice can marginalise our deeper goals toward developing a warmer relationship with all of ourselves. This can represent a profound shift that allows clients to realise more of their wholeness and fulfill more of their natural instincts.
Here is an example of how this power tool can work:
A client wants to create a successful business venture yet is stopped by doubts about being good enough. Traditional coaching might focus on building up more clarity around the goals and vision and encourage actions to help realise the client’s goals. This power tool suggests we spend some time with the client appreciating the doubts and learning more about this perspective and energy. Often the doubt is really wanting to protect the client from rejection or failure. By bringing more appreciation and understanding to this shadowy side of our client we support them in multiple ways:
- By appreciating all of who they are, there is less inner tension and more freedom.
- The client gets to develop more self awareness and curiosity about all of who they are
- Tapping the unrealised wisdom of inner critics and then being able to find support that usually lies at the core of those voices
- The critic can become more of an inner champion for the client
Coaching application and specific questions to ask to nurture the inner mosaic of life:
It can be helpful to first ground the client in their hopes and dreams and deeper values and connect these to a sense of the clients essence or heart or soul or whatever metaphor works best for you. From this place you have a strong foundation to explore other facets of the clients inner mosaic:
- Tell me more about the critical/doubtful voice?
- What are the energies of this voice?
- Do you remember when you first started noticing this voice in your life?
- Can you embody this critic energy now and let's explore its' deeper values and intentions?
- What support would this aspect of yourself like to feel more appreciated
- How can your essence or soul support
- How can your essence/soul support this aspect of yourself to feel safer and to act out less?
- What is your take-aways from this experience
Benefits that this power tool has helped create:
My experience with bringing this perspective to myself as a coach and to clients is it leads to more self-love, appreciation and confidence. It also creates a loosening and greater lightness of being when we can accept more of all of whom we are. The awareness of a strong core Self that can dialogue with and support the needs of the more insecure parts of ourselves can be transformative. And the client then feels more free to bring all of themselves to what they want to create in their lives.