A Coaching Model By Marc Blais, Leadership Coach, CANADA
The True Self
Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen. – Brené Brown
Imagine yourself as a tree with a full covering of leaves. A deciduous tree that has cycled for covering up and uncovering. This covering of yourself, like leaves, acts as a protection to the social environments you are exposed to. You can live your life being completely unaware of this covering, your camouflage, to survive the complex social situations and expectations of society. Every person has a covering (leaves) that act as a protective layer from the element (people).
Michelle DeRusha expresses it well in her book ‘True You’:
I suspect I’m not alone in my tendency to hide. Perhaps you, too, are clinging to your own array of brittle branches and desiccated leaves – using your false identify or even your daily routines and bad habits to hide from something. Perfectionism, workaholism, procrastination, consumerism, materialism – even substance abuse and addiction – are all different kinds of ‘leaves,’ different methods of self protection, different ways we have of hiding and avoiding.
The Role of the True Self
Are you hiding your true self, hiding behind your leaves? Who are you really? When you no longer surrender to life expectations and live intentionally as your spiritual self, what happens to you?
Our social protection in life is the leaves we hold onto. Individually each leaf does not change the look of a tree (you) but collectively it transforms what the tree is. But like a tree, we have seasonal cycles. You can choose to let go of your leaves or course life happens in unexpected ways that can instantly shake loose your leaves, bare and exposed to life. Without notice, you can be stripped of your leaves which instantly puts you on a journey of self-discovery. Whether by choice or life deciding for you, this is an opportunity of awakening for you to see your true self.
To understand who you are at the core (true self) is a dance with life. Life events and situations are seeds planted for you to nurture into the person you are meant to be. By all means, you are not meant to do this alone, it is the togetherness that allows you to see the real you. Partnering with a coach is the greatest opportunity for reflection, awareness, and intentional living. This partnership is the creation of a vision and then actualized through scaled-down small actionable steps, created by you. LEAF coaching is the uncovering of your spiritual being (true self) just one leaf at a time.
The LEAF Coaching Process
The LEAF coaching process is a formula for discovering true self:
Let go + Express yourself + Accept yourself + Flow with you = Revealing Your True-Self
1. Let Go
Like a tree transitioning with the seasons, it is healthy for you to let go. Let go of beliefs that no longer serve your well-being now or in your future. Releasing is a creation of space for your awaited possibility and expansion.
1.1 What are you hiding from?
1.2 What do you need to let off right now?
1.3 What habit is no longer serving your wellbeing?
1.4 What do you spend too much time on?
2. Express Yourself
Be vulnerable and honest with yourself for uncovering deep-rooted truth. Transform feelings into powerful words to express your inner self.
2.1 Who are you?
2.2 What’s important to you?
2.3 What is your true self?
2.4 What is your false self?
2.5 What is the difference?
2.6 What do you notice about yourself?
2.7 What is your relationship with your spiritual self?
2.8 What is the difference between form and spirituality?
2.9 What allows you to feel most like yourself?
3. Accept Yourself
You are the creator of your life; choose the action you will take today for a life of acceptance of and ownership. Said best by Iva Kenaz “You are the author of your own life.” Your true self awaits you by being you.
3.1 What are your values?
3.2 What is your life purpose?
3.3 What will you do for yourself today?
3.4 What is intentional living for you?
3.5 Wat action feels right to you now?
3.6 What actions are in alignment with your true self?
4. Flow With You
Step out of your comfort zone for a journey of discovery; shake the tree of your life and be you. You owe it to yourself to live authentically with your life.
4.1 What is your relationship with yourself?
4.2 What is trust for you?
4.3 What happens when you trust yourself?
4.4 What happens when you shift your focus from outer to inner?
4.5 What does going inward look like for you today?
4.6 What would you most like to do for yourself?
The unveiling of your true self is deeply personal and an emotional journey. Your journey can be the greatest opportunity of being free, a self-renewal, and true to who you are (true self). Give yourself permission to be true to yourself and as an extension to others. Be the shaker of your own tree. You have the power!
Finding True Self, a Poem dedicated to your soul by Ilchi Lee
Everyone has it
To know what it is
Take a journey deep within
And open your eyes wide.
Then you will see everything.
Even without knowing why and how,
Everyone has it in one’s heart.
Someday, you will see it.
Someday, you will see it.
Everyone has it,
Remembering what it is
As if it had been in a deep sleep,
What I have been is not what I have aspired to be,
Nor what I can be.
But now I can see it well,
I can see it through tears in my eyes.
Now I have the ticket to the stage of my life in my hands.
Though I am only halfway there,
I see there is a great possibility and light at the end.
Now more and more people are beginning to awaken as I have,
Yes, it really is a good thing.
Now more and more people are beginning to see what I see,
Yes, it really is a good thing.
True You: letting go of your false self to uncover the person God created, by Michelle DeRusha, published by BakerBooks
“Finding True Self”: A Poem Dedicated to Your Soul | Ilchi Lee (patheos.com)