Coaching Model: Acceptance

A Coaching Model Created by Sophia Tuckett
(Confidence Coach, CANADA)

I   use “Acceptance” as a core piece of my coaching model because we can change anything in our lives once we are willing to accept it and move forward with a plan. Many problems in our life cannot be solved until we accept that they are a problem first. My “Acceptance” model can be simplified into 3 key steps under the name A.I.M. The steps for A.I.M. are Awareness, Intention, and Mapping.

AWARENESS

Before a client changes anything, the client should first identify the reason for the change and be ready to accept whatever is uncovered. Helping the client enter a state of awareness and reflection is key to clearly defining their motives. Supporting the client to become aware starts with being fully transparent as a coach. Being as transparent as possible will help the client feel comfortable, relaxed, and open enough to share their feelings without feeling judged. Asking the client the right questions to get to the root of their feelings is key at the beginning. Through self-awareness, the client may uncover things that they have ignored or hidden. It may be upsetting to the client but identifying the feelings behind their desires helps the client embrace, understand, and accept why they want to make a change. Once the client fully identifies why they desire the change, they can accept their associated feelings, decide if they have the right goal, and move on to making a plan.  It could take up to two or more coaching sessions before they gain the awareness that is needed to accept what they need to work on changing.

Questions to ask:

• What are you feeling?
• What have you learned about yourself?
• What could you accept about this? (topic or situation)
• What are you learning during this period of increased awareness?
• How are these feelings serving you?

INTENT

The client will intend to reach for the sky. The client needs to be realistic but challenged by their goal. Starting with the strong “why” discovered during the awareness and acceptance step will help the client have the passion to keep pushing forward when times get tough. The time frame that the client sets needs to be practical, so the client reaches the deadline and doesn’t lose confidence while working to attain their goals. The “why” behind the client’s intent will keep the client excited, motivated, and driven to accomplish their goals.

Questions to ask:

• What do you want to see happen?
• What boundaries could you set to prevent this from happening in the future?
• How important is this to you?
• What is motivating you to accomplish this?
• How does this goal make you feel?
• How does this support your life purpose?
• What needs to change so you can achieve your goal?

MAPPING

The client will map out exactly how they plan to reach their goals. This will help the client move through their journey and with confidence. The mapping process needs to be based on “When and How” the client plans on getting each step towards the goal accomplished.  The more detailed plan the client gives the better. Not every client is best served with the same type of plan.  They can plan based on looking forward or plan backward starting from the end. The mapping needs to be what the client wants. As the coach, this is a great time to challenge the client, to get them to think about celebrating their goal as they work towards completing it.  Having the client speak about their goal as if it were already in their lives with positivity helps them stay determined to achieve their goals.

Questions to ask:

• How will you stay excited about achieving this?
• What do you value most about this plan? 
• What do you feel could hold you back?
• What structures do you have to hold you accountable and achieve this goal?
• How do you plan to reflect along the way?     
• How will you handle any setbacks?

This coaching model is not rigid. A.I.M can come into play in any order. A client could come into the coaching space wanting to start Mapping out what steps are needed to achieve a goal.  The client may have already gone through a process of awareness and reflection before choosing their goal. As a coach, you help provide whatever is needed for meaningful change.