Inside The Coaching Classroom: The importance of Trust and Intimacy In Coaching

What is trust and intimacy in a coaching relationship? 

Having trust and intimacy with a client is creating a safe space for the client where the coach is fully present and free of judgement.

It’s the tone, the pace of the coaching conversation which mimics the clients but leave them plenty of space and time for reflection.

When coaching a client you can only go as deep with the client as you yourself have gone…in regards to intimacy and doing “the work”. It is therefore important to know yourself intimately before you can coach a client,

Coaching trust and intimacy is when clients are comfortable and vulnerable in sharing their real issues and concerns. As most coaches will tell you the issue they come to be coached around is often only a symptom of a deeper issue and real intimacy comes when the client go to that deeper place of understanding.

Through practice and self-development we can as coaches develop our emotional intelligence to be able to establish strong intimacy with our clients.

During today’s lab on trust and intimacy I invited students to complete the following sentences to open the discussion:

I walk the talk when…

I am the best coach for my clients when…

I walk the talk when…

• I operate from a place of integrity.
• I demonstrate through deeds, not words.
• I live coaching lifestyle that i am preaching by being optimistic, mindful and trusting myself.
• I genuinely own what I said.
• I embody the values and principles of a professional coach.
• I listen to myself through an active daily program of checking in with myself, listening to myself and supporting myself.
• I demonstrate the ethical values and principles.
• I release self-judgement and what I think I ‘should’ be.

I am the best coach for my clients when…

• I am open and actively listening from a place of non-judgement and facilitation for growth.
• I acknowledge their feelings, listen to them and without judging.
• I am there for them in the moment, fully present and engaged. Also, when I trust myself and the coaching process.
• I practice active listening and support them as they explore opportunities for change in their lives.
• I am calm, curious and feeling abundant and giving.
• I am the best coach for my client when I am working within my coaching capacity and strengths and using supervision not to step outside of the processes where I know I am strong and have something to offer.
• I respect myself fully…so I can respect my client fully as well.
• I am able to challenge my coachee the areas of fear, doubt and frustration.
• I am fully present with my client, diving into their emotions when they present themselves, willing to to take risks, and practice “fearless coaching” and being vulnerable and sharing when relevant to my client’s goals.
• I am well prepared… like not hungry , thirsty, relaxed , quiet place, good wifi connection , etc … :):)
• I help them recognize how they are judging and comparing themselves and then help them change those limiting beliefs.

If you an accredited coach but you want to access our coaching labs where we look at and coach around the ICF competencies, speak to an enrollment consultant about joining our Coaching Labs for 8 Core Competency CCEUs.