Research Paper By Beng Lai Tan
(Business Coach, SINGAPORE)
Coaching has inspired my life and I want to share this experiences. Everyone have its own talent and experiences but we lost our focus and priority in life. Everyone have a GPS but we seldom use it. In this article I would like to share with you the insight of Focus and Priority. Once you understand Focus and Priority, you will always keep your GPS on. Coaches are your satellites to navigate your GPS.
But how do you set goals when you’re feeling stuck? I was in this situation a few years ago. After resigning from my job, and no clear sense of what I wanted to do next. I felt lost. After years of annual SMART goals that I pinned on my bureau, I couldn’t figure out how to direct myself.
The stuck feeling usually comes in one of three varieties. Sometimes you don’t know what you want next in your life or career. This was me when I was stuck. Other times you know what you want but have no idea how to go after it — you feel trapped. Other times you just feel stuck and aren’t sure why.
Everybody feels stuck from time to time. The question is how do you set goals that will help you get unstuck? Having gone through it, here’s my advice.
Focus on process goals instead of outcome goals.
Outcome goals are goals with a desired outcome, like losing 20lbs or completing a marathon. Process goals are specific actions that create a routine, like running 3x/week. When you’re stuck, process goals provide structure and momentum, even if you’re not sure where it will lead. When I was stuck, I set a goal of doing yoga 3x/week. I didn’t have a plan for where it would take me, but it revived me physically and spiritually. It’s still part of my routine.
In my view, this is the best way to get unstuck: to get in touch with your spiritual core and deeper sense of purpose. This is the source of the “why” in our lives.
If you’re not sure where to start, set a goal to pray or meditate for two minutes every day, or to spend time in nature. Find an action that helps you get in touch with your inner wisdom and higher power. As cliche as it sounds, renewal usually happens from the inside out.
Try something new
In stable periods, it makes sense to set “focusing goals” that build on the past. Grow income by 150%. When you’re stuck, try “exploration goals” that expand your horizon by exposing you to new things.
If you think about it, being stuck is your psyche’s way of telling you to explore. So why not embrace it? By widening your aperture, you’re more likely to stumble onto a new passion or rekindle your sense of purpose.
Network in broader circles
When you’re stuck and introverted, the last thing you want to do is to “network.” Try this instead: Get in touch with one new person from your past each week — the college friend, the former colleague, the LinkedIn contact you haven’t talked to for years. The point is to tap into new perspectives and different worlds, while reconnecting with distant friends and contacts. Studies show that your “weak ties” are the most powerful for finding opportunities.
Get rid of stuff
Sometimes the best goals are ones that create space. Are certain behaviors, like drinking, holding you back? Roll them back or cut them out. Has that giant house become an albatross? Maybe it’s time to sell. Are you in a toxic friendship or relationship? Maybe it’s time to enforce boundaries.
When I was stuck, I got rid of most of the furniture I’d been keeping in storage. It felt great to clean house. Eventually, when I got a new place, I hired a decorator and designed a space to reflect “the new me.” I wouldn’t have been able to do that if I hadn’t created the space.
Make a bold action
I’m a big fan of the BOLD ACTION as a way to get unstuck. It’s risky, since bold actions don’t always work out. But they definitely shake things up!
For some, a bold action might be quitting their job, asking for a raise, or starting that new venture. It’s amazing, the energy a bold action unlocks.
Get a coach
I’m convinced that being stuck has roots in the subconscious — in those inner tensions we feel but can’t really articulate. This is where a professional can help.
When I was stuck, my Coach helped me realize that there was a growing difference between how I wanted to lead my life and how I felt I should live it. It helped me move forward.
Start with ONE THING.
When we’re stuck and low on energy, a list of suggestions like this can feel overwhelming and pestering. Where do you start? My advice is to set just ONE goal that speaks to you. This is all it takes to get going.
So please, set at least one goal every year and just do it. You’ll be unstuck in no time.