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Dis-empowering perspectives
I’ll start with…(whatever activity)...tomorrow. I’ll have another game, another level, another text message, etc. It is so important to stay up to date with Facebook. I tried to … and it doesn’t work. It is not as bad as it seam, it is only a.... I love buying second hand, it is so affordable to us. At least we are healthy and have for food…We would replace our broken washing machine, but we are too busy paying our rent. These are bad times for everyone, we are lucky to have a home. If I won a lottery then… Living healthy is too expensive. I will be a failure if I quit this job now. I hope I will make it somehow tomorrow. I like my life style and I just need to learn how to work better under the pressure. I hardly manage to enjoy my wealth. I have to work hard.
I need to keep this job to pay my bills, supporting my family. I don’t want to be a quitter.
I must support my spouse, he/she is important. My life is hard. I am under stress. I can’t do anything, it is beyond my power. I am not good enough. I am not worthy, I am a looser, I am a failure…I am burnt out. Drinking relaxes me. Drugs relaxes me. People makes me angry. I work with incompetent people.
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Empowering perspectives
Reading a book inspires me. Reading a book I feel much more involved and engaged with the content than watching TV. Painting a canvas is relaxing and I have a beautiful canvas to hang on my walls. Jogging with a friend gives me a lot of energy, keeping me fit and is strengthening my friendship so much more. Eating healthy and light food I feel I have done something for my body, supporting healthy food industry and the environment. Being able of having fun time with my friends without getting drunk or over eat feels so much better next day. Even though I am afraid to ask myself:” am I too comfortable in my life, am I siting too much in my comfort zone?” afterwards I am empowered with the awareness, that I can do something about it. Even though I am afraid to ask myself:” am I in the trap of false security?” I am empowered with the awareness, that I can do something about it.
My dreams work when I work first.
Having a dog is going to keep me outdoor more and walking the dog is fun and good for my body and I can meet many people and find new opportunities.
Doing something completely new helps my brain to stay fit and adopt better to changes, it also keeps me out of danger to get trapped into too much comfort.
When I realize I don’t like where I am at, I can do anything else to get me to where I truly want. Once I know what I truly want it is easy to get it. Being curious of knowing and then living Purposeful Authentic Life is the key for a fulfilled life.
When I feel I am getting good in one thing it is time to start learning a new thing.
What are some activities putting me into a state of gratification? When I am too proud and satisfied with my life, work, etc. and it smells on comfort, it is time for a change.
What if this… is just a dream and I can dream a different and a better dream, the one I truly want?
Every mile starts with the first step. The oceans are just a little single drops of water persistently, perpetually and consistently joining together when raining.
Although I need this job to pay my bills, supporting my family, supporting my life style I have the power to find another one that promote my health better, a more desired one.
My life can be a lot easier when I allow myself and allowing to adapt to changes.
Although my spouse’s career is important, I am allowing myself to have my own, even if I am just the CEO of my family.
I allow myself to believe I am worthy of true security, I can do this, it is in my power to make a different choice …
I allow myself to be encouraged, inspired, energized, invigorated, achiever, successful, a winner.
If I am able to believe it is hard I am also equally able to believe it can be easy. It can be easy to make the first and then the second and then all the necessary steps to live Purposeful Authentic Life.
I give myself permission to deeply love and accept myself and to live a Purposeful Authentic Life.
When I do what I love and like, I never mind if it was challenging and how long it takes, I did it and I would do it again.
In the moments of anxiety or depression I do whatever it takes to bring in the light, I know the dawn is coming right after. There comes the sun after every rain.
It is just a job and there are even better jobs for me out there and I am making myself ready for my dream job. Being fired simply means the Universe tells me the job was not for me. I should be more honest with myself what I want when applying for a job.
My health condition, my race, my religion, my sexual orientation, my personal condition are my best trainers in the process of learning self-love, acceptance, allowance and tolerance.
I love my self and I appreciate the opportunities life gives me, to take charge of my life in any given moment right now. I am the CEO of my life. I can always try again in a different way, at a different place, with different people as long as I am alive.
I am much more than my work, my habits, my behavior, my skills, etc. I chose and deserve to live Purposeful Authentic Life.
I was loved in my life and I am loved right now because I love myself.
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Questions to identify dis-empowering perspectives /beliefs /behaviors
Internal factors
- How do I act and behave in times of temptation to pleasures?
- What are my beliefs about pleasures I give in the most?
- Do I give myself in to pleasures instead doing what I must do?
- How am I feeling about myself giving in to pleasures instead doing what I must do?
- What do I believe about life security and safety right now?
- What are some false security beliefs that I have, keeping me away from achieving what I want?
- Do I know what I truly want, what my authentic life purpose is?
- What do I believe I am doing wrong in my life?
- How comfortable do I feel with things I don’t want and yet I have them in my life?
- Am I in a trap of pleasures over the life affirming feelings of gratification?
- Am I drinking, smoking pot, not exercising, gaming, eating, and escaping to other pleasures instead doing what I must do when I have to do it?
- Do I change from one commitment to another quickly or often?
- Do I tend to moderate what I want when it seems too hard to get it?
- When do I feel being hurt the most?
External factors
- What are the pleasures I tend to give in to?
- What are few top things prevents me of being successful, more efficient, productive, creative, loving, loved, slim, fit, happy, etc?
- What are few top things preventing me to live my Purposeful Authentic Life?
- What / Who is hurting me right now?
- What gives me a false sense of security?
- What is giving me most comfort right now and in general?
- Do I allow outside influence to change my one commitment for another one quickly or often?
- What are few top things making me chose to keep myself from being happy, successful, loved, etc?
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Questions promoting empowering perspective /beliefs /behaviors
- What am I grateful for right now, today, in my life?
- Who are the people in my life I am most grateful for?
- What would be the kindest thing right now I can do to myself?
- If I’d have the power to do just anything and money is not an issue, what would that be?
- What is that I love to do, think of, engage with?
- What is that I really want? Is what I want worth taking risks, spending time and resources?
- What is bringing a smile on my face and lightness to my heart?
- What is that I am best at?
- What do I believe about myself in moments of success?
- What are my most supportive habits helping me achieve my goals?
- What are some life affirming activity that when I do them I totally lose track of time, I enjoy them and they gives me a sense of fulfillment?
- When is that I feel energized, enthused, great, gratified and that feeling last long time?
- What are some activities that I feel inspired and gratified and that feeling last long time?
- What are some actions / activities / engagements that when I do them, they always move me forward?
- When do I feel most inspired? What is inspiring me the most? Who inspires me the most?
- What do you need right now the most?
- What is the worst thing that could happen here and what are some solutions for it?
Self-empowering exercise
The Present is the present of the present the only moment we are fully empowered to take responsibility for our life and to create a change toward what we want.
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Exercise One
With the lightness in your heart and honesty, quickly write down at least one thing that brings you into a state of gratification, one thing you excel at, one thing you are good at, one thing you want to improve at, one thing you would love to begin with, one new thing you would like to learn anew, one thing you would like to share with others, one thing you want to teach others, one thing that inspires you, one thing that turns you on, one healthy thing that you like to eat, one healthy thing that you like to drink, one habit you are proud of, one habit that makes you successful, one person you like to hang out the most, one person you want to spend more time with, one person you would like to know better, one person you would like to make friends with, one person you admire, one person you are most grateful for, one person you miss the most, one person you enjoy spending time with, one person you spend the most time with, one person that inspires you the most, one person making you happy, one person you would take to a distant island and spend the rest of your life with. Feel free to expand your list. Once you are through with answering, I want you to go through the questions and answers and reflect on them.
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Exercise Two
Take 3 long slow deep breath and then slow your breathing to the half of your normal breathing rate. Observe yourself from inside. What do you feel right now and where in the body do you feel it? Express gratitude to yourself of having this conscious awareness of your feelings and to the body holding those feelings for you. Allow now and observe how you let go of them each time you exhale. Each time you exhale, they float out and disappear. I want you to decide what is that you want to feel instead right now. Remember a time when you had those feelings. As you inhale bring those desired feelings in to your hearth. Observe how these desired feelings are now spreading through your entire being with every beat of your heart. Simply allow your heart to transmit this desired feelings into your entire being and it also spread way beyond your body. And you feel just wonderful all over.
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Meditation
Retreat to quiet place where you won’t be disturbed. Before anything, set an intention for this meditation, as a positive affirmation. For example: I want to resolve… If you have an established meditative practice, exercise it. If you don’t have one, simply focus on your long slow breathing. Breathe in the ease, the all-knowing and love into your heart and follow your breath in. Exhale, exhaling out your discomfort, fear, quilt, shame, anger, blame, any burden of your shoulders. While exhaling follow your breath out until you cannot follow it any more. Do that for few minutes. Make a statement: I completely love and accept myself now for who and what I am. I am the best and the only candidate for the job of my life and I love it. I love and accept myself now. Repeat that statement for several time and notice the change with in self. If you feel like chanting then chant. If you feel like moving, dancing, do that. Allow yourself to be free in your entire and complete expression that you are. Then stay in silence and ask yourself: “What is that I need to know right now?” Allow yourself for the answer to come to you, be it as a direct knowing, image, sentence someone tells you, etc. When the answer comes, you will know.
Start your day with a question: What am I willing to trade my life for today? Who are the people I want to spend most of the time with?
Questions for reflection
The only risk of being inspired is that it won’t cost you a thing and it might make your life even better.
Reflection is integral part of any transformative process. Reflecting on our insights, achieved new learnings or new awareness also assist us to better integrate this new learnings into our life. Following there are number of questions outlined assisting that process. This is an open ended list of questions and the reader is invited to make their own.
- What experiences did you recall while reading this Power Tool?
- How did this power tool helped you to create awareness?
- To what extent and how did this power tool helped you to shift your perspectives?
- What do you believe makes people rather to choose pleasures and false security over gratification and PAL?
- Think of a situation in which you were caught up in pleasures. What was the deception you were in? What were the feelings connected to it? How did handle the situation?
- What does security do for you and what does pleasures do for you?
- What do false security and pleasures do to you, your relationships, commitments, effectiveness, productivity, dreams? Remember a time when you were able to stretch out from your comfort zone.
- Can you remember a time you were totally consumed in doing something you like not being aware of time and space. How is that related to your PAL?
- What are some personal techniques or hints that you developed or can develop to achieve gratification as often as possible and to keep you on Purposeful Authentic Life – PAL direction?
- What questions would you ask a client who is overly holding on to pleasures and false security? How would you know you are not siting in your comfort zone right now?
- What need to change in your life to make you want living your Purposeful Authentic Life – PAL? Where are you right now in your life in relation to where you want to be and where are you in relation to your Purposeful Authentic Life – PAL?